When You Appreciate The Good, The Good Appreciates:

I’ve noticed something really interesting over the last several months. It has to do with the energy, time and motivation I have for people who are appreciative. Now, while this may sound like an extremely obvious idea, which perhaps has taken me forty years too long to grasp, I’ve also noticed that many of us have a tendency to place far too much attention on people and activities that just don’t appreciate.

Note the duel meaning here; by appreciation, I’m talking about both an expression of recognition and gratitude, as well as an increase in value. As founder of the Happiness Studies Academy, former Harvard Professor in Positive Psychology and author of the book Happier, Tal Ben Shahar states, “when you appreciate the good, the good appreciates.”

So, what does it mean to “appreciate the good”? Is it as simple as passively taking note of the things that make us grateful, and perhaps even stating them out loud, and writing them down for ourselves? Or, could more be done in the form of appreciation? Is it possible that more of the finer things in life could appreciate, like love, deep friendships, rich conversation, success, wealth and overall life satisfaction, if we took more time to actively express our appreciation of others?

4 Tips To Cultivate More Patience in an Impatient World

Are you overly critical of yourself when you don’t see your goals develop quickly enough? Join the club. Even though we all innately understand that our biggest dreams will require a lot of time and energy to fully manifest, most of us get a little impatient when we don’t see instantaneous results.

We all know that immediate results aren’t typically part of the “let’s try something new” equation. Yet, we live in a world where we can order just about anything with the simple click of a button, only to find it on our doorsteps the very next morning. Most of us are incredibly impatient, and why wouldn’t we be? Waiting is not a common component of our everyday lives.

So often, impatience leads to giving-up and completely abandoning our goals, only to feel skeptical about the very dreams and aspirations that used to inspire us. So, who couldn’t use a little inspiration to stay-the-course with our biggest goals from time-to-time? Here are a few tips to do just that.

Know The Difference Between Busyness and Business

As I’ve wrestled my busiest self for all of these years, a few things have become abundantly clear. For starters, there’s a lot more to my “busyness” than all of the tasks, projects, accomplishments, social engagements, and activities I take on. Behind all of these things is actually a deep-rooted neediness to be recognized because of a much darker state of being – one that haunts me at my core.

For most of my life, I’ve stretched, flexed and adjusted my schedule to accommodate just about anything that seemed mildly “important,” just to numb-out a stinging voice underneath it all, which actually says, “I’m not very important.” And, what better way to discount this voice than to prove it wrong with everything I do?

As I’ve grown to own and understand this state affairs, I’ve also come to recognize a vast difference between my busyness, versus tending to important business. While the former keeps our need to feel important pacified with lots of distraction and noise, the latter is a disciplined choice to stay hyper-focused on what really matters. And, to know what’s really important, we have to get to know ourselves at a level far beyond what we do. As the late and great Wayne Dyer said, “I am a human being, not a human doing.”

How Do You ‘Transcend Your Ego’ When You Are Surrounded By Big Egos?

Ego. The three-letter word that just about every spiritual practice or personal development system tells us to try and let-go of and transcend.

Often associated with traits like arrogance, conceit, competitiveness, condescension, and judgment, these attributes typically mask a person’s low self-esteem or the smallest version of themselves.

Let’s face it, few people would describe someone with a big ego as pleasant, and few people who exhibit these traits seem happy, so it’s a wonder why so many big egos exist at all. Yet, they do – all around us.

So, how on earth are we supposed to transcend our own egos, when big egos surround us everywhere? They prance around us at work, within our communities, all over social media, and even within our own governments and families.

How are we supposed to ‘keep up’ without building a big ego of our own?

7 Ways Being Your Own Mom Will Benefit You

In anticipation of Mother’s Day next month, I have a simple question.

What do you think would happen if we treated ourselves like our own moms treat us, or better yet, how might we treat ourselves differently, if it were more like how we treat own children?

If we did, I think we’d probably all live more joyful, stress-free and purposeful lives.

Think about it, the most nurturing mothers not only love and accept their children, no matter what, they also always see their children’s value.

I’ve often laughed at my own mom for openly pointing out my strengths and boasting about my successes, big or small. I’ve shrugged off her words with thoughts like, “of course you’d say that mom – that’s because I’m your daughter.”

But then I remember an important fact.

My mom has been with me from the beginning. Like it or not, she knows me better than most people – the good, the greatest, the bad and the ugly.

Yet, she chooses to always make room for the best version of myself. And, quite frankly, if we could all do the same for ourselves, I think we’d all experience much more inner peace.

So, what can we learn from our moms, and how can we model their behavior to benefit ourselves?

How Does Your World Mirror You?

Most of us enjoy the connection we have to all of the things that are going well in our lives. And, why wouldn’t we? Our own responses and actions to the people, places and things we interact with, each and every day, deserve the utmost credit when it comes to our wins.

In the same vein, we are also deeply connected to all of things we don’t like. Yet, many of us would prefer to escape these sorts of accreditations, and replace them with blame. Blame of the people, places and things that cause us to react in the very ways we don’t like. In doing so, we simply remove our most powerful mirrors, which when noticed, reflect some of life’s most profound personal lessons.

To notice our reflections in all situations, whether we label them as ‘likes’ or ‘dislikes,’ we need to move past our own victimization and finger pointing in order to see the lessons. The lessons guide us with the most accurate compass for action. They teach us more about ourselves, as well as how we can personally impact change, by assuming accountability for what’s happening in our own worlds.

When we become personally responsible for what happens to us, we empower ourselves to make a unique impact within our own lives, and also with the world at large. So, where do we find ourselves in life’s mirrors, and how can we learn from their most valuable reflections?

5 Ways We Avoid Discomfort & How It Restricts Us To Lead

When we attempt to avoid discomfort, we actually make things even more uncomfortable than they have to be. Sometimes all it takes is one uncomfortable conversation to solve a problem, or better yet, implement a brilliant idea. The bottom line is that our ability to get comfortable with discomfort, not only raises our own effectiveness; it also separates true leaders from followers.

True leaders are willing to confront discomfort with ease, while those looking at the back of their heads would prefer to uncomfortably shy away from discomfort. So, what are the signs that you, or someone you know, chronically avoids discomfort and how do others perceive it? Here’s a list of what I like to call, the all too common “discomfort avoiders”

7 Reasons To Stop Cursing Work

Why is it that so many people in today’s world view hard work as the antitheses to success? In the eyes of many, it seems like unless you are off sailing the world, lying on a beach, playing tons of golf, and living a life of leisure, you might actually be failing. So, what’s the result of this type of thinking? And, better yet, how successful is it in, well, actually achieving success?

I often come across people on an ongoing quest to accumulate wealth, while limiting their involvement with actual work. Their ultimate goal is to live life to the fullest by avoiding too much responsibility that comes with the word. So, what happens next? Well, quite often, these same people end up calling a career and executive coach, like me, feeling “stuck.”