5 Myths Worth Challenging

written by Nina Cashman

Now that the #GreatResignation is an official “thing,” I see so much misleading information about what’s “needed” to make a career change, or successfully transition in life. Today, I’d like to take a moment to clear-up some of the biggest myths swirling about in today’s social media stratosphere : ).

Myth # 1: You need to know your passion, in order to find your purpose.

Hmm, this sure sounds nice, and yet, it’s totally untrue! I love the old stoic saying,

“the obstacle IS the way.”

That’s right, sometimes, our greatest passions are only discovered by actually leaning into our challenges.

To bring this concept to life, I like to think about the inventor of Velcro, George de Mestral, who discovered this staple of modern day society by noticing how cockleburs caught in his clothes and his dog’s fur after walking in the woods. Instead of seeing this issue as an “annoyance” (like most of us would), he was able to appreciate this natural “hook and loop fastener” and convert other people’s challenges into something useful!

If George believed that opportunities only came from "passions," I wonder if he would have ever been able to convert a perceived "problem" into a massive worldwide solution?

Maybe it’s time for you to allow your own challenges to become stepping stones, as opposed to obstacles. Maybe the solutions to your challenges could become your next "passion project" ; )? And, if you’re like me and most human beings out there, we tend to experience the transitional periods of our lives as pretty challenging. So, this leads me to yet another myth…

Myth # 2: You’re doomed for failure, if you cannot always maintain a positive attitude.

Okay, at what point did humanity completely disconnect with reality and start commanding a “positive attitude” all of the time?

Uhhhh, the last time I checked, based on my own experiences and those of any other red blooded human, I think it’s safe to say that transitional periods are almost never painless or easy. In fact, they’re almost always unclear, disorienting, chaotic, and well, totally uncomfortable.

I mean, when was the process of learning and growing ever meant to be a 🍰cakewalk 🍰 anyway? Just take a look at reality to see what I mean:

Our fitness and metabolism grow when our muscles burn. 💪💪💪
New systems evolve when old ones breakdown. ⚡️⚡️⚡️
Babies learn about balancing from falling. 👶👶👶
Relationships grow when we let-go of old habits, and allow our interests to evolve. 🧞‍♂️🧞‍♂️🧞‍♂️
And, ultimately, our brains grow through the sometimes painful process of letting-go of what we’ve always known, in order to draw-in what we've never known before. 🤯🤯🤯

So, maybe it’s time to cut yourself some slack and stop pressuring yourself into gloss over your painful experiences with false positivity, and instead, give yourself permission to be human. The sooner you can admit that you are unhappy, the faster you can start making necessary changes in your life to get happy.

Myth # 3: You need to have a well-researched, uber-specific plan before leaping into something new!

OMG… this is sooOOOOooOOOOOoOOOOOoooOOOOoooOOOOOO corporate! Tell any author, artist or athlete that they need a "step-by-step plan" before they write, paint, create their masterpieces, or play their favorite games, and see what happens 😆. Sometimes, our need to control every last detail of our unpredictable world is the very thing that’s keeping us stuck!

Yes, it’s great to have goals and visions, but to get tangled in minute details of every little thing, is not only unreasonable, it’s a royal waste of time!

Often times, the only thing that is going to inform our next best step or “plan” is the world’s real-life response to our actual efforts. And, as the late author Dr. David Schwarz wrote in his book, The Magic of Thinking Big,

“action cures fear.”

In other words, taking concrete steps to actually do what your mind can only plan, might be the only thing that will settle your nerves. Doing is rarely as scary as contemplating. Just think of any time you’ve moved – your anticipation is almost always worse than the move itself!

Myth # 4: Follow your ❤️.

The heart is a beautiful aspect of our human experience – it enables us to feel the world arounds us, and connect with people, places and things at deeper levels. Yet, to only listen to your heart is to override a couple of other amazing gifts that our human composition has to offer – our BRAINS and our GUTS ; )!!

From my school of training, iPEC (the Institute for Professional Excellence in Coaching) there’s a concept called "Holographic Thinking," which reminds us to draw on our head (rational mind and ability to think logically), our gut (intuitive center, which enables us to sense, or know without knowing), AND our hearts (emotion and feelings).

So, don’t just follow your emotions when it comes to making your next career move, make an effort to draw on ALL OF your gifts – and check-in with your logic and intuition at the same time.

Myth # 5: Results outweigh your experiences.

Nerd alert 🚨🥸🚨! What are we, a bunch of walking spreadsheets or something 📉🤪? I think it’s fair to say that the purpose of our short time here on earth is to simply experience life – and all of the painful and joyful circumstances that come along with it — not to analyze it!

Getting too wrapped-up in the results of what you expect to achieve is a great way to keep yourself feeling stuck. I mean, after all, what if you fail, or the results aren’t exactly as you “expect” them to be?

When we are too focused on outcomes, we miss the ride altogether! And, the actual journey towards our goals is where we’ll find all the lessons and opportunities to keep going. If you’re too focused on the end goal, you may not notice a viable opportunity if it smacked you squarely in the face 🤚!

Remember, failure is as much a part of our lives as success. And, more often than not, our ability to learn from failures is often what gives us the ability to achieve MUCH LARGER results than anyone could have ever expected. So, maybe it’s time to loosen your grip on your self-imposed expectations, and allow the infinite world of possibility to inform your experiences?

So, there you have it. Five myths that I simply had to bust apart for you.

Why? Because it really drives me crazy that people buy into nonsense, only to allow it to stop them from taking concrete actions towards pursuing their dreams.

Are you being held back by one or more of these beliefs?

Now that you see they are just common misunderstandings, there’s no need to allow them to stop you from making your next bold career move, or to live the life you want (and deserve)!